Smiley, happy and slightly unhinged 29 year-old wife, daughter and sister.
I live with my darling husband Tony in our modest 1920’s British terraced house, complete with double-glazing, power shower, leaking roof and dodgy garden-gate. We absolutely love it and hope to pay the mortgage off at some point in the next three million years.
I definitely talk too much.
There are several items of clothing at the back of my wardrobe that I will never ever wear. But I’ll hang on to them just in case.
I really shouldn’t wear orange. Ever.
My favourite pair of trainers really needed replacing about 18 months ago – but I love them too much and can’t bear to be parted from them. They smell of feet.
Rain is not my friend.Love rules.
SO WHAT BRINGS ME HERE, WRITING ABOUT THE STUFF AND THE THING?
PLAN A. When I was 4 – I wanted to be a Nurse. I quite fancied the uniform and having one of those stethoscope thingies. Alas, my aversion to blood and all other bodily fluids prevented me from advancing beyond Calpol and Booboo plasters.
PLAN B. I took it upon myself, aged 7 to contact Blue Peter and apply for a presenting job (on the off chance that Diane-Louise Jordan met an untimely end). My papier mâché talents knew no bounds and I was more than willing to wing walk, sky dive or bungee jump for money. Hindered by some minor health and safety regulations and child slavery laws, my application was rejected. Bureaucracy gone mad I tell you.
PLAN C. By 9, being the most talented artist in my entire class at Primary school – I decided I was destined to draw for Disney. Then I went to Secondary school and realised that compared to the 237 other students in my year – I was decisively average. Another dream dashed. So much to cope with so young.
PLAN D. At the grand old age of 11¾ I decided to teach.
All of my qualifications were subsequently chosen specifically to get into teaching. Then, most unexpectedly, having just graduated from University (with honours) I had an epiphany- a majorly scary one. I no longer wanted to teach. Oh dear. No Plan E. (Note to self: ALWAYS HAVE A PLAN E).
I found a temporary, boring grown-up job in banking to tide me over for a few months – until something better came along. Six and a half years on and facing imminent redundancy from said boring grown-up job, I decided to have a mature conversation with my wildly successful older brother about career choices and stuff. He suggested something totally unexpected. Something quite brilliant actually:
“DO SOMETHING YOU ENJOY”.
Which brings me here – writing about the stuff and the thing.
Thank you brother xx
Love it!! Just subscribed.
Happy New Year in advance
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Sorry if this comes off completely condesending and/or nationalist (I don’t know if this word exists, but I needed something that could possibly mean “a belief in the supremacy of one’s own nation”… what is that word?), but I absolutely have to follow your blog for not only your great wit and writing but also because of (the nationalist-sounding part) your adorable Brit-speak. Adorable!
You have made me day. Thank you! 🙂 Long may my adorable Brit-speak continue 😉
YES — I had that same conversation about work and career — Find something you LOVE to do, and find a way to make money at it. Funny how the same advice took me is a very different direction, but . . . hey — looks like we are both happy.
If you peek at my blog, you will see 😉
I am Naughty!
So I’m happy and you’re happy…now we just need to get the rest of the world smiling. Are you with me? 😉
Thanks! I shall take a peek!
Thanks to your Brother and to You for sharing your Talent, Wit and Humour!!
You are too kind! 😀
You made me day too. I love talkin like y’all. It sounds so cool. I am a new blogger and I really loved your story. Happy life. D
Thank you very much! I’m kind of new to this blogging malarky too – 7 weeks in and absolutely loving it. Keep it up! 🙂
I like the plan breakdown, though it seems like your planning peaked at 11 and 3 quarters. Plan E, hmm?
I think it did peak when I was 11. Oh dear, that can’t be good… 😉
I’m so glad you were Freshly Pressed – your blog is a great read! Your style (in ‘speaking’ and in life) remind me so much of my sister that it’s scary (in a good way). I’m looking forward to more posts. Oh yeah, congratulations!
Thanks! I’m pretty glad I was freshly pressed too! 😉 Am so honoured! Your sister sounds wonderful – I like her already ;D
i need a plan tooo…A B C all are down… i need a plan D….
loved your blog… 🙂
Thank you 🙂 I have no idea where the popular myth that you merely need a plan B came from. I think most people reach Plan D at some point… Here’s hoping I stick with Plan E!
I just started with my plan…after D too. After leaving my job in the office, I am happily now doing something I enjoy too. Keep it going! Best Wishes!
Thanks! Good luck with your plan E!
Oddly enough, I had a similar career path. I began as a chemist/physician at the age of 8, working almost exclusively on my teddy bear, but with great (albeit, green) results. After realizing that field would require far more years of schooling than I was willing to commit to, I moved on to teaching my collection of stuffed animals and my one live student (my younger brother). I was only about 11, but I was excellent. I had very few classroom management issues and students’ focus in my classroom was exemplary. However, I could not raise their test scores. So, I moved on to architecture when I was in early high school. After realizing that I was only supposed to draw straight lines and they had to be measured accurately, I decided this was not the field for me. From there I went on to psychology, neuropsychology, teaching, media specialist, and now to what seems to be some kind of diarrhea of the fingers (nasty image, but I started writing and just can’t seem to stop… as evidenced in my long winded comment!).
At any rate, I love your blog and am glad you found something that you enjoy. You are also bringing smiles to others and I wanted to recognize that by giving you a little award I made up to celebrate people who crack me up! Check here to find out more about the (non-cash, non-trophy, non-TV spot recognition, yet still highly coveted) award:
Thank you so much for sharing! You really made me giggle. I am truly honoured to have been given such an award. Thanks! You have made my day 🙂
This was a great read! 😀
Thank you! That’s the plan! 🙂
Now that was delightful. I am really quite glad plan A-D didn’t quite gel for you. E for enjoy.
Wise older brother; clever little sister. As other readers and new fans have commented, I am so please you were freshly pressed Ms. J. Thank you for the laugh and the engaging story. Best wishes for bliss and other things you enjoy this year and beyond. ~Laura
What a lovely thing to say, you are very kind. My brother will most definitely be delighted by the “clever” comment too 😉
I just love writing! It’s great to know that others love reading it! Thanks again – you have genuinely put a huge smile on my face 😀
I. LOVE. YOU. In a completely platonic, non-stalker kind of way of course.
When I told my father at a young age that I wanted to be a lawyer he laughed at me. So I pretty much ditched that idea immediatley.
When I was a freshman in high school I discovered, much to the amazement of my class mates, that I had a talent for writing. Picture “Mean Girls” but at an all girls Catholic school. I know, scary right.
I went to the University of Iowa initially as an English major hoping to attend the “Writers Worshop” graduate program someday. I had trouble with some of the ciriculum. I changed my major to Theatre. I had been a star of the stage in high school and I had decided I didn’t really want to go to graduate school.
I have a degree in Theatre Arts and I have spent the last 15 years in banking. This is where you go “Ohhhh, that’s where she was going..” Yeah, sorry it took so long to get there.
I’m looking to get out of banking and had wanted to start a blog for several years. Now I just have to figure out how to turn it into a money making career. I’d love any advice you may be willing to give.
I love you for saying that! Thank you so much! 😀 I’m pretty sure there’s a post waiting to be written about your Mean Girls / Catholic school drama. Just imagine the possibilities! 😉
I would love to impart advice about how to make money from writing – but the reality is I’m a total newbie to this myself and am pretty much making it up as I go along. I started this blog just 7 weeks ago – I’m totally blown away that I made Freshly Pressed at all, let alone so soon!
My rough plan at present is to continue working full-time in banking to pay the bills, win the bread / bring home the bacon etc – write my blog in my spare time and then once I’ve built up a portfolio of work (I’m guessing this will take a year) start applying for legit writing jobs. Being Freshly Pressed has REALLY helped – because my hits sky-rocketed overnight. It’s got to be the best exposure your blog will encounter and an excellent portal for people of influence to ‘discover you’. There are lots of articles on here providing tips for how to get picked – definitely worth a read.
Aside from that, I would say – write often, write well and enjoy it! (I’m pretty confident you already have the latter two in the bag). Good luck! If you figure out the secret – please tell me!
Wonderful read. Funny!!
Why thank you! Glad you enjoyed it 🙂
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Good stuff! I am new to the world of blog too and so far all I’ve managed to do is talk about nursing. Cheers for doing something for yourself!
Thank you and you’re welcome! Keep at it! 🙂
I absolutely adore everything about this. I rarely follow blogs immediately, but you, my dear, are quite the exception. Cheers, and continue doing what exactly you’re doing.
Cass – I love you already! You clearly have excellent taste 😉
Such kind words. You are welcome here anytime! 🙂
Love your sense of humor! Thanks for sharing it!
Glad you like it! You are welcome! 😀
Can’t believe you forgot about Plan E… always have a Plan E!!!
Haha.. love your about me page and Congrats on being Freshly Pressed. Your brother should be proud 🙂
I am now aware that the lack of a plan E was a glaring oversight. How foolish of me!
Thanks for the kind words. Here’s hoping plan E is a success! 🙂
Hi there 🙂
I have just nominated you for the One Lovely Blog Award –
I really enjoy your blog and look forward to seeing more of it!! xoxo
What a thoroughly lovely thing to do! You are marvellous! Thanks! I have posted the award on my profile – and anyone who clicks on it henceforth shall be taken to your ruddy marvellous blog. Honoured!
I saw somewhere… on another blog I read…
“If Plan A fails, don’t worry! There are still 25 more letters to go!”
I see you are on Plan E. That’s wonderful! The alphabet and I are not getting along. The last 4 – 8 years (depending on how far back you really want to go to lay blame or the amount of denial I am feeling that particular day.) have dashed most of my planning.
I am thinking of resetting my Alphabet Planning Schedule back to A. You know, a clean slate. No more beating myself up of past failed attempts of success.
Have a great day 🙂
How marvellous that there are 26 letters of the alphabet 🙂 I’m pretty sure the Greek alphabet includes letters we don’t have…maybe you could borrow a few of theirs? 😉
Good luck and thanks! 🙂
Hello! I have nominated you for the Liebster Blog Award, details of which can be found on my site: http://chanceofsun.wordpress.com/2012/02/15/for-me/. Hope you don’t mind – this is a nice way for me to say that I really enjoy reading your blog!
Mind? Of course I don’t mind! I am honoured that you felt I am worthy of such an accolade! Yay!Thank you very much indeed! Glad to have been of service 🙂
You’re very welcome! 🙂
Love your blog jessseeker! My wife had a Shaun The Sheep (or was that Shorn The Sheep) backpack! She tells me it kept her back incredibly warm. This is now my job.
Thank you! 🙂 I LOVED my Shaun the Sheep backpack, though sadly he didn’t like the rain. *Sob!*
Is back warming your full time job? It sounds like a pretty good career move 🙂
Yes, it is. But being a robot I have to keep very well lubricated.
Just found your blog and I love it. Thanks for making me laugh.
You’re welcome! I’m on a mission to get the whole world smiling! Wish me luck! 😀
Hello, not quite sure how to go about this… so… I’m an editor for a little start up online arts magazine called Murmurations. We are currently in the process of trying to get our first issue together and I was wondering if you might like to contribute an essay (the magazine isn’t just art, it’s poetry, essays, short stories, photography and art). Granted, I am not the editor in charge of essays, but I’ve read your posts and I’ve really enjoyed them. Let me know what ya think! 🙂
Hi Janelle, I’m delighted you’ve enjoyed my work. That sounds like a fantastic opportunity and I’m definitely interested. Are you able to tell me a little more about Murmurations and the sort of thing you’d be looking for? Thanks 🙂
Hey, so as I said before, Murmurations is (going to be) and online arts magazine. We’re not getting paid for out work so (sadly) neither will you. Basically, we want to give people like you a chance to expose yourself. We’re looking for original works that we think will strike a chord with the general public. Don’t worry about conforming to us, because we are conforming to you.
Does that make sense? Let me know if that doesn’t answer your question. 🙂
Well it all sounds very exciting, so I would love to take part! Thanks for asking me! If you search through Facebook, you’ll find I have my own ‘jessseeker’ page. If you can message me your personal email address through there, I’ll be in touch 🙂 Thanks!
I have enjoyed reading your adventures and am officially nominating you for The Versatile Blogger award! It’s a rigorous process to comply with blogger popularity. 😉 I wouldn’t know anything about that. Haha!
For more info, come check out my blog! (I promise I am not trying to shamelessly plug my own blog.)
Savanah, thank you! I am honoured 🙂
I’d like to dedicate this award to slap bracelets and jelly shoes! 🙂
What a perfect dedication! I miss those things! Straight from 1992! Hahahah! 🙂
Thank you for subscribing to my blog because now I know your blog exists. And knowing your blog exists makes the world a little less awful. Thank you for that.
It seems we have Angie of Childhood Relived fame to thank for bringing us together. Isn’t she ruddy marvellous? 🙂
I think Angie deserves an invisible fancy schmancy award for uniting us. One with stars and glitter* and bells on! 🙂
*Special glitter. None of that cheap stuff that sheds everywhere, and you find three weeks later on the inside of an eyelid. That would just be an insult.
To pass on the favour, according to blogosphere rules, I’ve nominated you for a Sunshine Award and a Very Inspirational Blogging Award! Thanks for your hilarious writing which always makes me laugh.
Congratulations to you on your award winning blog and your fabulous red locks, for which I am very jealous! Thank you for the kind nominations, you’ve made my day. Delighted to have made you smile. 🙂
Keep up the great work and thanks again! 😀
I’m totally with you on never wearing the color orange. Very few people can pull it off. I’m not one of them.
Michelle Obama can pull it off. I think that’s it. Shell suits and spandex should also be avoided at all costs. 😉
Hi! I have tagged you in a post so that we can get to know one another a bit more. Look forward to hearing from you! This is the link: Getting to know me…..
I’m it! Woo hoo! Shall check it out. Thanks my dear. 🙂
I’ve nominated you for the Sunshine Award – if you’re interested in spreading the good news – keep it going – if not that’s ok too! http://momwhearingloss.wordpress.com/2012/04/11/sunshine-award/
Thank you for this ray of sunshine! 🙂 I’d like to dedicate my award to my former Tiny Tears doll. May she rest in peace. 😉
Let’s hope she rest in peace too – I once had a horse stuffed animal – carried it everywhere – may he rest in peace too!
Just happened upon your blog. Not even quite sure how?? Started with the “10 Commandments of Facebook” and scrolled down a few more. Laughed my as@ off. Though I arrived at having NO JOB quite differently that you–I am also unemployed…
And 41. And a former homemaker, turned single mother of teenagers. Divorced. Low on Funds. On paper, quite the loser actually. Then I finally found a job several weeks back–only to lose it within a couple of weeks. If you want to feel better, might want to give my accounting of that disaster a read: http://playingwithperfect.com/2012/04/03/so-much-for-my-new-job/
It is sure to make you feel fantastic!!! At any rate, I’ll be following your blog. And looking forward to more laughs. It certainly looks like you might have found your career…
Hello fellow jobseeker!
I do hope medical assistance was not required when you laughed your as@ off! 😉 Thanks for sharing your story – I shall check it out. As for the comment of me having found my career – you have just made my day! Thank you! It was this or pole dancing… 😀
Hi Jess..i have just nominated you for the Sunshine Award.. 🙂
Can you believe it was snowing earlier today? Snow! It’s mid-April! So extra special thanks to you for bringing me sunshine! 🙂
I would like to dedicate mine to one of my favourite school teachers whose favourite phrase was “Silence when you’re talking to me!” 🙂 Congrats on your much deserved award too! 🙂 Go us! 😉
wow snow at this time of year… 🙂
yay go us… 🙂
And here I am in Northeast Ohio…wearing (gasp….) shorts for the first time. Yay for me!!! Not so good for those forced to gaze upon my ‘severly white’ legs….
and for some reason it has been raining for past 3-4 days now.. even now i can hear the thunderstorm .. 🙂
i have again nominated you
here please check.. im nominating you for the Kreative Blogger
Awww, thanks again! Check you out with all your awards! Shall we print them off and laminate them?
Thank you! Thank you! Thank you! 🙂 *Dances around room*
hahaha… 😀 I think that’s a great idea we should both get out nominations laminated ..
i was dancing too 🙂
congratulations Jess… you truly deserve it because every post of yours is super hilarious… and because i think you are a great person..
Now stop. You’re going to make me cry! THANK YOU! Just what I need to hear in my current jobless state! :S
Would you be so kind as to follow me on Facebook? Just follow the link and click ‘like’. I’m trying to build my Facebook following. All part of my plan for world domination. 😉 http://www.facebook.com/jessseeker